My daughter starts secondary school tomorrow. As for my son, I have written her a letter that I have shared with you below. I deliberately do not share many details of my children on this site, it should be their choice because parents of their friends will read these posts. However, these letters are very dear to me and I hope they will keep them forever. I give them to maybe act as stimulus for yourself to do something similar.
Firstly My Son’s
Our Dearest ******
As you enter the ****** School you have achieved so much so far in your short life. You are a fine young man. You are someone we, and many, love spending time with. Not because we must, or out of a sense of duty, but because we want to. You are developing a lust of life and friendships that will stand you in great stead in the future. We are immensely proud of you and fortunate to have you in our life.
There will be setbacks and disappointment in the next seven years and beyond. We cannot, or should, protect you from these. We will be there for you whenever you need us. You know this and must never feel that you can’t ask for help. We will always do what is best, not what is easiest. We will keep confidences and stand next to you in adversity.
There will also be great successes and excitement. We hope that we will also share these with you. Enjoy them and treasure them. They are the reason for living. The harder they were, the more they are worth. Running a marathon is more rewarding than a mile as it has taken more commitment and effort. Deep and meaningful gratification comes from knowing this. Friendships and relationships, rewarding work and achievements are not easy and shouldn’t be taken for granted or expected.
You come from a house where you are loved and supported. All we ask from you in return is you are the best you that you can be. You don’t have to be the best or win anything. Make lots of money or be the most popular. All we ask is you to try and grasp life with both hands. As you enter the ****** School remember these words that I have told you many times before
Life is not a dress rehearsal.
Seize this and every other opportunity that you have. Take risks and chances. Don’t be scared to commit to things that seem impossible. We will be your safety net so don’t be afraid to try and fly. The worse thing that could happen is that you don’t stretch out your wings and show your potential.
You are brilliant even if you don’t always see that. No human being does.
All our love and friendship
Mummy and Dad
And Now My Daughter’s
4th September 2023
Our dearest ********
It has come time for you to start the ***** School. We appreciate that this is a difficult and uncertain time. It is hard to know how to avoid making mistakes, especially when you don’t even know what the questions are! We see your nerves and worry. We understand it. It is right and normal to feel that way.
This is very much like life. These uncertainties can often seem overwhelming. However, they can also be opportunities to be grabbed and embraced. The only way to not make a mistake is not to do anything. This will always be the biggest mistake anyone can make. Life is not a dress rehearsal, this is it.
A school can only open doors, to walk through them and thrive you need to know yourself and like yourself. This is easy to write and hard to do. Anyone who tells you it is easy has not done it.
The next few years this will be you. You will get to know yourself. Not who you think we want you to be, or what you think you should be. But who you are. It is so exciting to see who that will be, but one thing I know is that it will be amazing. There are no expectations from us to be ‘great’ or the ‘best’ but just to try. Try to be the Annabel that you really are. You are deeply loved and supported by many people. As throughout your life so far, there will always be a cuddle and reassurance as well as guidance. No topic is too embarrassing, no ask to small, no concern too trivial. We are so proud to be part of ‘Team ******’ as well as your biggest cheerleaders. There is no mistake you can make that will change that.
Use us as a safety net. As you turn into Queen B try to soar high. We will catch you if you fall, as you will. But your wings will get stronger, you will find your direction and you will succeed.
You bring so much joy into every room you enter, make sure, over the next seven years you make plenty of joy for yourself. That is not selfish. There will be tears and failures. Slammed doors and loud words. But there will be great laughter and memories with friends and family. Savour them all and don’t take them for granted. You have earned them all.
The gift is an atlas. There is a reason for that. You are fascinated by the world. You want to see it and make it better. To protect all the people in it. Don’t be shy but sit and flick through the pages and look at places far away and fascinating. Dream about visiting them and then try and make it happen. You have a depth of soul that put many adults to shame. Wear it as a badge of pride.
I often speak about choices. Choose ********. She is worth everything you put into her. Remember what makes that ******* happy. Genuinely happy. I see it when you have that special sparkle in your eye. You can’t disguise that. Do more of those things and spend more time with people that give you that sparkle. It brings the shine to the crown of Queen B.
You are brilliant even if you don’t always see that. No human being does.
Lots of love
Your loving parents, biggest cheerleaders, and dearest friends.
Mummy and Dad.
