Celebrity parenting styles are intriguing as we find it hard to see celebrities as parents. But that will be in a similar way to that which some of you might find it hard to imagine your colleagues changing nappies! We have read through several interviews given by celebrities about their parenting styles and given our thoughts as to what we can learn from them.
As an unfortunate sign of the times female celebrities are asked far more often about parenting. Reading through these it is unfortunate that all of these are female. In the future we will write an article that purely focuses on male role models and their parenting.
Although this article is based on celebrity parenting styles this is really a look at parents and what we all do well as individuals. There is always much to learn from looking and reflecting on parenting in different cultures.
Drew Barrymore
Regarding her wild child days as a teen star, Drew explained that she will not pretend to her daughters that she’s as pure as the driven snow. Making poor choices does not equate to being a horrible person. It is how you develop the ability to choose wisely.
This is good, it is always tempting to portray yourself as the child you want your child to be. However speaking with relative honestly about your struggles and the mistakes that you made will make your child far more willing to heed your advice. It allows you to frame your guidance as, I made this mistake and I am talking to you about it as I don’t want you to do the same as I care about you. For celebrities their errors are far more easy to find out about!
Christina Aguilera
Our next example of celebrity parenting styles is Christina Aguilera. Her quote is ‘No child is awful’. She talks about knowing the value of patience when raising a toddler. At that age, you’re just learning how to express yourself and balance all these emotions and feelings. Aguilera is definitely a patient mother. She also values discipline greatly.
This all gives the example of balanced positive parenting. Giving boundaries and judging the behaviour rather than the child. This element of parenting gives great security to a child, they know where they stand, and they know that if they make a mistake it is not personal.
Victoria Beckham
I have to admit, I am a fan of the Beckham’s and realise that the stereotypes that are portrayed can not be true. However, Victoria has always had tough rules for her children. She says that they behave impeccably. They always say “please” and “thank you.” But at the same time they continue to run around the house acting wild, singing, dancing, and kicking footballs around, all of which Victoria forbids them from doing, but it seems to be the one behaviour she is unable to control.
To me this sounds like a happy household. Clear discipline but also not feeling that they can’t express themselves in their home. It is important that a child feels their home is theirs rather than a show house they are lodging in.
Tia Mowry
Is an actress and a prominent breastfeeding advocate. She claims that she just naturally gravitated toward attachment parenting. She said that being a working mom, her hours are insane, so she likes doing things like letting her child sleep with her in bed and taking him around with her.
This is something many of us can relate to. We work hard and want to make sure that the time we spend with our children is really valuable and close. This is understandable and not unhealthy. The one word of caution that we might be aware of is is this entirely great for the child. They are the centre of world and then might not see the parent for the next two days. For older children this is not a problem as they understand and appreciate that when you can you are there for them. For younger children it can be very confusing and can leave a partner picking up a lot of pieces when the child doesn’t understand why the sleeping partner from last night who wouldn’t let them go is no longer there. They could question if they have done something wrong. Loving your child unconditionally is not measured by the amount of contact time you spend with your child.
Shakira
Shakira says that in Spain, parents speak to their children as equals, and she feels that the children respond in turn. Their dad [soccer player Gerard Piqué] and Shakira both grew up in extremely close-knit households, and it has made them openly affectionate parents.
In mediterrean household families eat together round the table most nights. The children also stay up late and spend alot of time round an extended family. This amount of time, if you have it, does give the opportunity for ‘light contact’. Regular interaction and easy conversations. However, I am always wary of keeping children up late as it suits me, while they are then exhausted the next day. We all do it, but it should really be for occassions rather than just because. The easy solution is to eat earlier if possible.
Sarah Michelle Gellar
According to Gellar, she thinks “the most important responsibility for parents is to provide their children with the tools they need to be able to go out in the world and make decisions for themselves.”
It is hard to disagree with this. What is the role of a parent is a conversation I would love to have with anyone for hours. There is no ‘right answer’. But one of the key roles must be to help prepare for leaving home. One of the main aims of this site is to support that.
Reese Witherspoon
When Reese was growing up, her parents instilled in her the value of having respect for her elders. When addressing grownups, they used phrases like “yes, ma’am” and “no, sir.” But that’s not what children in Los Angeles do. However, Witherspoon doesn’t allow her children to address adults by their first names.
Reese Witherspoon advises her children that they can address adults as “Miss Shannon” or “Miss Heather,” because using only the first names may not seem respectful.
Reese also supports Sunday church attendance and having children prepare the table for meals at home.
It is easy to confuse celebrity parenting styles with what we see on films. However, it looks like Reese is keen to instill old fashioned values in her children. This is her choice, and can not be judged for this as it causes no harm. I like the children helping with the table. This can sometimes be seen as harder work than doing it yourself, however, you know you are winning when they do it without being asked!
Penelope Cruz
Penelope practises RIE parenting, which promotes treating children with respect and talking them through issues. When it comes to instilling respect and communication skills in children, RIE parenting offers the best tools.
We discuss this style in depth elsewhere on this site. In a nutshell it is about giving children the benefit of the doubt that they are able to do something. To let them have plenty of independence to grow in confidence by success, but also learn from their mistakes. In any good parenting this should be the basis, but obviously this can go to extremes!
Molly Sims
You may be a parent and still love your child more than life itself and be friends with them. According to Molly Sims, she’s a really fun mom, but also a parent with rules. You still need to sit down when eating, and have to eat at a table. You also need to say “yes ma’am” and “thank you.” Being from the South, Molly is tough but also enjoyable to be around.
Based on the interview above it sounds like she has it sorted! A relationship where discipline means the children know where they stand, but then on this are able to express themselves in a relaxed environment.
Mayim Bialik
Mayim is a vocal supporter of all aspects of attachment parenting, such as nursing for an extended period of time, baby-wearing, and co-sleeping. She has never had a crib, according to her book, Beyond the Sling. In her home, there is only one bedroom. That bedroom contains two mattresses next to each other. They all share a single large bed.
This is an extreme of attachment parenting, and if it works for them as a family this is great. To do this takes a vast amount of energy to be consistent, and it is important that the children, as they get older, get more independence. No matter how hard this may be on us.
Kristen Bell
After the birth of her first child, Kristen explained that she had taken a really casual approach. She allowed Lincoln to breastfeed until she decided she was finished because she sleeps brilliantly and enjoys being in her crib by herself. Kristen Bell values providing her child alone time so that when she eventually grows older and isn’t everyone’s centre of gravity, she won’t feel as though the ground has been torn out from under her.
Celebrity parenting styles, much like all of us can be diverse. This is the opposite of the one above, but it works. This could be seen as a great example that we have to be careful judging people by what we do. A supportive loving environment can take different forms. Personalities of families can be very different and should not all be the same.
Kourtney Kardashian
In an interview, Kourtney said she did what came easily to her and that she didn’t plan it. Mason was her first child, and Kourtney instantly felt a strong attachment to him and wanted to take him everywhere. Kourtney would sleep with Mason on the same bed, and she nursed her baby for 14 months.
Kim Kardashian
Kim Kardashian admitted to being a strict mother. Although she’s really playful and fun, Kim is also very rigid about naps and having her child sleep in her own cot. Kim acknowledged that her sister Kourtney prefers to bed share, but they have distinct parenting philosophies.
I must admit I don’t know which Kardashian is which. Shocking I know. However it is interesting to note that these sisters probably had a similar upbringing, but it has caused them to have different parenting styles. We talk here about how your upbringing might affect your parenting style.
Kelly Ripa
Kelly’s child learned that there are repercussions for breaking the rules when she was denied access to her phone. Ripa admitted that she doesn’t think her daughter likes her, but she doesn’t care. Kelly always reminds her child that she’s not her friend but her mother!
The last sentence here is so true. The love and respect of a child for a parent is so much special. If you need to be their friend to feel love, you need to look at basis of your relationship.
